A few years ago, I attended a meeting where a beautiful professional Swedish woman proudly showed us all her engagement and wedding rings and described why it was the best idea she’d ever had to marry herself.

Self-marriage or Sologamy is now an established viable lifestyle and a strong trend. Being single and really enjoying oneself is becoming very acceptable, whether it is for a few years or for a whole lifetime. The idea is that one totally commits to their own life. And it is so much more common than it was say 20 years ago. You totally engage with your life and make conscious decisions and choices, to focus on yourself, to put yourself and your happiness and career first, to be present and self-responsible, to love and take for better or for worse, in sickness and in health…. I thee wed.

Some Sologamists have an actual wedding ceremony with the vows, presents, the photo album, the reception etc. …..and even the honeymoon!

It’s totally possible to live an enjoyable, successful, fun and fulfilled life on your own terms, without a partner to be your ‘other half.’ ‘Other half’ implies that you are a broken being or that you are incomplete and need another to be what you tell yourself what you cannot be for yourself. This leaves you always needy. It’s not about being ‘selfish’ or being narcissistic. It’s a choice to personally connect with yourself. It’s a rite of passage perhaps, where one focuses and engages in the internal experience, valuing and loving our very being, and taking responsibility for your own happiness, for your own choices and decisions. It’s about taking responsibility and be willing to have the awareness that every choice (even what seem like small choices ) creates something. This is what creates your life.

Choosing sologamy doesn’t mean that you don’t have romantic or sexual relationships, or that you choose this your whole life. It means that being kind, forgiving, loving, open and self-nurturing means that you are more capable to love and respect someone else. 

How much are you committed to yourself and your life?

Would you marry you?